Wednesday, November 20, 2013

A year later - a world of difference

In roughly two weeks - it will have been a year since I got back from my insane 3-month trip to India.

When I came home from India, I had no idea what to do with my life. It was a question I had been worrying like crazy over before the trip - but a friend smartly told me to cut it out because the person leaving for India would not be the person coming back, and I should just let her deal with that shit. Well, he was right. But the person coming back from India was just as clueless and lost as the person who left. She was also a lot more optimistic about the kindness of others, and optimistic about her own ability to make it through anything that came at her.

I came home from India with no immediate job prospects, no place to live, little to no money, but not too much baggage. Everything I owned pretty much fit into a couple of suitcases (for the literally not too much baggage!). I was healthy. And while I did suffer the occasional bout of post-travel depression I was doing well emotionally.

I also came home to the best friends in the whole world. Friends who let me stay in their spare rooms. Friends who helped me when I needed help. Friends who reminded me day in and day out how happy I was to have come home to Boston.

And then I broke my leg. And that is when I became so grateful for the person I became due to my time in India. That trip taught me I could ask for help, and that I had people in my life who could and would stand up and help me. That trip taught me I could handle isolation (and believe me - the first two months after breaking my leg, even though living in the city I call home and having a lot of friends around... I still felt really fucking isolated because I was STUCK and couldn't get around on my own and I had to rely on myself even while leaning so often on my friends). India taught me to hope for the best, and even when things looked like they were going to suck (and even on days when things *did* suck) things *WERE* going to get better.

I have no doubt... none whatsoever... that I would not have handled the experience of breaking my leg and the resultant surgery and months of recovery as well as I did if it had not been for my travel experiences. For the person I became because of travel. For the lessons I learned.

It has been almost a year. I have a job now. One I love. One that will give me opportunities to explore my interests - artistically and scholastically - and find the path I need to follow in order to pursue my long-term goals. And most importantly - one where I can be myself every day.

It has been almost a year. I found an apartment. I move in on December 1. It's been so long since I've had a place of my own (more or less - I'll have 3 or 4 roommates in this new place) - I moved out of my last place at the end of January 2012 - that it's going to feel so strange at first really being able to spread out and have MY THINGS around me again. I won't be as free to up and bounce off, as I have been, but I'll have a home again. And that is important to me. More important than I think I ever knew before.

India took so much out of me. And it has taken me more or less a year to recover entirely. But I don't regret it for a second, because who I am today... I would not be if it hadn't been for that experience.

I am glad though to finally be putting down roots again. Roots are nice.